| 2020-05-11 03:33:18 |
Experiences in Branding
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I would never mark my property so stupidly. It's unnecessary. |
| 2020-06-14 03:29:46 |
Account of an Aussie Orgy
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Written in such a matter-of-fact manner with an emphasis on getting through the story quickly, it seemed like I was reading a newspaper article. |
| 2020-07-06 05:42:10 |
SUBMISSIVE WIFE EMMA
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This could be a good story but you've written it like a newspaper article! Plus, there are lots of punctuation and spelling errors. The sentences are lengthy and often run together. There's too much of "she said", "he said". That's your chance to create dialogue! As it is now, it's simply boring. Have you read any of the highly rated stories? There's a good reason that they're highly rated. They get readers aroused and by the way, that's why we're here! Find a good editor and try again. You can do this! |
| 2020-07-06 06:15:41 |
Bound in Blood pt. 1
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This is a wonderful beginning since it leaves me wanting more! Your stories are always fantastic. I especially like your character development. We get to know the people. Sure, the sex is always hot but your stories are so much more. I love vampire stories so this is already making me hungry for more! |
| 2020-07-27 03:45:36 |
True Confessions of a Real Slave Part 3
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Interesting, not stimulating. In my opinion only, you'd both be healthier with a good psychotropic. Drinking urine is dangerous to your health. |